'What's Your Feminine Archetype?' Series: The Ingenue.

VOL. 1

what’s your feminine archetype? I’ve decided to go head first into all of the feminine archetypes each week. how y’all feel about that? this post is gonna be for the ingenue bitches!

ya see, I’m at that age where I’m still figuring myself out, learning myself, understanding my turn ons and turn offs, my body, my mind, and my appeal. growing up, i really didn’t have women to look up to. i grew up around majority men. and even with them around, most of them failed me. so, coming into my femininity has been a journey for me. frequently, we see these conversations about sex appeal in women— but it’s a very monolithic lens we have when it comes to that. there’s actually so many different types of sex appeal. and what I’ve learned is that in stepping into that and owning that— you can create a higher sense of confidence, magnetism, and charm. it also helps in learning how to utilize your particular appeal to get what you want. To figure this out, I took the Feminine Seduction Quiz. 

now, what archetype do I fall under? well… two. The Ingenue & The Goddess. But for now, we’ll focus on Ingenue and y’all let me know if you fit into this. 

so, the Ingenue. she’s the girl that looks very innocent, childlike, and youthful. yet, there’s a womanly nature to her and naïveté that makes her the ultimate paradox. for example: they’ll have the large, doe eyes and round face that makes them look like a kid, but then they’ll have also a beat face that yells mature sophistication. these women can have a small, petite frame but hips/ass at the same time that lets you know they’re for sure… a grown woman. they could have a childlike personality, but dress in a way that contrasts that. and that paradox? it is super alluring to men. they give off innocent and naive. these women are super imaginative, spontaneous, idealistic, magical, bold, delusional, brazen, quirky, giggly, awkward, aloof, and equally intriguing.

when you think of an ingenue, think of the kinda woman who speaks first, thinks later. think of the kinda woman who makes impulsive decisions without considering the consequences. the kinda woman who doesn’t always pick up on social cues. she’s spunky and eccentric. but has an allure at the same time. again: a walking paradox. the woman who can roll a blunt for you and also watch cartoons all night with you.

their allure lies in how childlike they are. it’s like no matter how many cards life has dealt them, they have a fascinating way of maintaining an audience with their star power, unfiltered inner monologue, and their fearless drive. they inspire others to take risks, to be authentic, to think for themselves, and to consider perspectives that are not necessarily popular. they’re crazy, sexy, and cool. kooky, odd, and eccentric.

the men usually drawn to these women are men who are the complete opposite: dominant, strategic, power driven men. why do they like these women? Ingenues bring a freshness to their otherwise structured day to day lives. usually the Ingenue’s energy is an energy they’ve never experienced before because it’s so rare in such a curated world. There’s a spice they bring with their whimsical and magical approach to life. Men love her quirks, her innocence, and her humor. The Ingenue brings a sense of youthfulness and play to these men. 

I’d like to say that most women that fall under this archetype are usually the neurodivergent women. You know… the girlies with a touch of the ‘tism or the ADHD girlies. We’re very unfiltered, blunt, and possess this humor that throws people off guard. We say things we are not supposed to say. We’re unhinged and unapologetic. Very raw. Very real. Nothing demure about us, in my opinion.

Now, in researching this archetype throughout movies and films and even seeing it play out in real life people, these women often have a very very dark side to them. they’ve often experienced immense trauma, abuse, or mental illness, along with this display of vulnerability that makes them easy targets to people. Take Marilyn Monroe, for example, her childhood trauma and depression only amplified as she became America’s sex symbol. Playful, yes. But equally as vulnerable, as we can hear in some of her interviews. We also have Rihanna— pop culture’s brazen rockstar and trendsetter, who only became victim to the insensitive jokes and commentary when she experienced domestic violence. Eartha Kitt, famed actress and legendary voice actor and activist, who experienced extreme neglect from her family and countless heartbreak from the men in her life. Lisa ‘Left Eye’ Lopes, rapper and creative, known for her visionary rhymes and quixotic style— burned her man’s house down after she realized he was cheating. Men are very drawn to their authenticity and vulnerability— most times because it is something they themselves lack; however, this makes Ingenue’s magnets to emotionally unavailable and abusive men. They are tasked with mastering discernment, grounding themselves, and developing their intuition.

These women effortlessly bring out the protective side of men because most times— they can see things that their lady cannot see due to their naïveté. Their partners are usually scanning the room, making sure their Ingenue is good, well, and protected.

Don’t be fooled though, sometimes Ingenues have a tendency to purposely play dumb and nervous to see how a man receives that. They are masterful strategists in disguise. You see, while many think they are clueless and blind— Ingenues are actually incredibly strategic and know exactly what they are doing. The "cluelessness" is sometimes a carefully constructed illusion, a guarded approach to ensure safety and build trust. That "cluelessness," those carefully constructed giggles, the "clumsiness," and the nervousness? A performance designed to assess the energy of the room, understand the dynamics at play, and ensure her own safety. Ingenues are keen observers, studying behavior, facial expressions, and patterns while appearing completely detached. They are far more strategic than people give them credit for. Usually, they’re very distrusting of men due to past traumas involving sexual abuse or physical abuse, but letting a man know that isn’t always the best option. so, they occasionally put on a performance to study you. They don’t just open up to anyone.

now me? an ingenue? didn’t surprise me.

recently, I’ve been dating and like y’all know… i attract a very particular type of men. i went on a date a few weeks ago, and this man just kept telling me, “I can’t pinpoint what it is, but you look like a kid, but like… You still look like a grown woman if that makes sense.” I chuckled, because I get that a lot from men and women. But most times it varies depending on what I’m wearing, what my hair looks like, the kinda makeup I do, and how I’m feeling. I’m like a shape shifter honestly, when it comes to my style— props to my Gemini Venus. One minute I wanna wear an outfit that shows off my shape, the next I wanna conceal my figure. One minute I wanna keep the shit real minimalist, the next I wanna have fun with spunky patterns, textures, and colors. This also translates to my personality and aura. I feel like around some men, I’m very nervous and giggly depending on how long I’ve actually known you, and around some men I’m chill, laidback, and relaxed especially if I’ve been spending a lot of time with them. One day I’m the earthy hoodoo girly who talks to trees, the next day I’m crazy as hell and on 10 (could be the Aderrall, idk LMAOOOO). I never look one particular way all the time, and I guess that’s the Ingenue in me. Falling under this archetype is great, because it doesn’t box me in.

I’m very unconventional. Especially as a Black woman. I’m not like everyone else, and I don’t say that in a pick me kinda way, either. I’m just being honest. A lot of things I’m into, other women are not. A lot of my opinions and views on the world, dating, life, and sex? Many women disagree with me. I possess this very outside the box thinking that scares other women who have chosen to choose the safer, socially acceptable form of thinking. I challenge everything and I have no desire to conform or be anything less than who I am. I'm sometimes extremely too honest and vulnerable about my shortcomings, my flaws, my blindspots, and my journey. That also scares women. Because we’ve been conditioned to be very curated, perfect, mystique, and to show up in one particular way to attract a husband or a boyfriend. I’ve always been that oddball kinda Black girl. Standing out because of my thoughts, hobbies, style, and aura. Friend groups? They don’t work well for me.

I’m also awkward as hell, y’all. Yes, awkward. I’ve always resonated with Issa Rae’s Awkward Black Girl series and I find myself revisiting it to reinforce some confidence in me, because my awkwardness be blowing my shit bruh. I haaaaate it, but that’s who I am. That series makes me realize I ain’t alone. It’s like I do the most awkward shit until I get comfortable with people or places. My social battery be dying. I be disassociating. I be stimming and shit. I don’t know why niggas like me these days. That shit still a shocker to me.

Now, if I had to choose some songs for the Ingenue, here’s what I would select:

1. Scene 1, Sebastian Mikael

2. Nissan Altima, Doechii

3. Sailor Moon, LAYA

Now, tell me… are you an Ingenue? Take the QUIZ here. And stay tuned for next week’s archetype. We’ll be exploring: The Goddess.

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