kam's zodiac guide.

did I read you for filth or nah?

Anyone who has ever been blessed with my presence will know within fifteen minutes that astrology is a part of who I am. Some people have Christianity or Buddhism– but I choose astrology. At work, they started calling me “Mother Earth” and “Flower Power” because I’ve always been so great at picking up people’s zodiac signs. I study people. I usually know within a couple minutes or a few interactions what your zodiac sign is. I used to think it was bullshit, until I realized that we have an entire birth chart with different placements that explain the core of who we are. If you really study it, you can also find some clues into what your life journey is, what drives you, what industry you belong in, how you love, how you fuck, as well as things you need to work on. It all lies in the stars, I promise you! Take a peek at it. 

Once I started studying astrology, I started seeing that people who fall under a particular sign always have some of the same qualities or hold a similar aura. I’ve dated every sign with the exception of three (Sagitarrius, Cancer, and Gemini), and I’ve familiarized myself with the traits of each sign. My pattern recognition is insane, giving me this attentive personality where I’ve started piecing together the energies of every zodiac. I figured… why not dive deep into it and show off my astrology skills? Let me know if you resonate with any of it, but also keep in mind… astrology isn’t an end-all-be-all. There are so many aspects of life that shape and mold your personality, communication style, and being. Also, other placements in your chart could explain your disconnect with some of the common traits associated with your sign. 

EARTH SIGNS (Capricorn, Virgo, Taurus): 

I know people probably expected me to start with fire signs, as Aries are the first sign of the zodiac, but this my shit. It just wouldn’t sit right with my spirit to NOT start with us. 

Earth signs are known for our deep desire for stability and security, as well as our deep connection with the Earth. Most Earth signs find ourselves feeling merged with nature, appreciating the beauty of the world beyond the visual aspect of it. We’re the type to see a beautiful tree in the distance with this urge to place ourselves near it. Stability is important for us. When we are in situations where we feel unstable, it scares us because it is not our natural element. We like things to be in order and for things to make sense. We’re also very stubborn not just when it comes to relationships, but even in the way we approach life. We are determined, laidback, chill, with an insane work ethic/drive. Beauty and aesthetics are important for us, explaining why most Earth signs are able to approach our creativity with an emphasis on nature and beauty. We’re grounded, practical, and logical. 

CAPRICORN: 

Capricorns stand on business and that is not an exaggeration. Most Capricorns I know are relentless when it comes to accomplishing their goals, and they usually always have their shit together. These signs are pure hustlers. They hate relying on anyone and look at everything from a solutions based standpoint instead of being emotional all of the time. Capricorns can have a very stoic and stern personality, but they also have a unique sense of humor. They’re guarded when it comes to their feelings and doesn’t show a hint of emotion unless they really deem you trustworthy. These signs are cautious and often are very curated as far as their public image. 

When it comes to dating– especially the men, they will wine and dine you. Date nights will always be luxurious and lavish, and they take pride in being able to flaunt their expensive taste. Capricorns go for partners who are go-getters, ambitious, and hustlers. They typically will have a partner who has a polished look, as well as a sense of direction. They are strict. When dating them, please understand that they do not play games. Once their eyes are on you, their eyes are on you and no one else. They hate feeling played with and will bounce the moment you give them fickle energy. Capricorns are very traditional and usually conservative. They want it all– the wife, the kids, the white picket fence. They want the American Dream. 

What I’ve noticed about them though, is that they rarely give themselves time to rest. They accomplish one goal after another, never stopping for a second to enjoy the fruits of their labor. Self-care days? What is that? Capricorns are always in go mode and looking for the next business move to make. This can make them a little detached, but with the right people in their corner– they can learn to slow down. 

THEME SONG: Money, Cardi B

VIRGO:

Virgos are known for their detail-oriented and perfectionist ways. These signs are very attentive, critical, and refuse to do things that do not make sense to them. Once they have a vision, that is their vision. They will not stop until everything looks the way they pictured it in their head. Think of precision when it comes to them. These signs are also extremely private. You won’t know anything about them unless they choose to tell you. They’re selective when it comes to their friends, lovers, and career moves. They aren’t going for just anything just because it is sitting in front of them.

As far as dating? Virgos will not accept the bare minimum. Why? Because they will not give the bare minimum to you. These people actually find joy in offering assistance and help to their partners. Have a project you’re working on? Virgos always want to help. Need help running an errand? You can count on a Virgo. If your love language is acts of service, a Virgo may be the sign for you. They find pleasure in being of aid to others. Reliable, practical, and dependable– they’re always there when you need them. Communication comes easy to them and they are very direct communicators. Virgos will not beat around the bush, nor censor their delivery. A lot of people call them judgmental– but I wouldn’t call them that. It’s just that if they don’t like something, they won’t act like they do. They are the definition of “if you like it, I love it.”

Virgos should work on prioritizing their own needs before helping others. Sometimes, they can be people pleasers, especially because of their helpful nature. But they must learn to consider themselves first. I also feel like Virgos have a tendency to be super meticulous, not allowing them to let go and just be in the moment. Careful, Virgo! Learn to not be in control all the time– as it can deprive you of some great experiences. 

THEME SONG: Virgo’s Groove, Beyonce

TAURUS: 

The best sign of the zodiac, easily. People are always calling us lazy, sluggish, and slow. But I’d like to say that we just aren’t doing anything that isn’t in alignment with what we want to do. We are also very set on our visions and understand the importance of relaxation and winding down. Y’all other signs choose to be led by hustle culture, but us Tauruses? We are not going for that shit. One thing about us? We gon sit our asses down. Y’all will not drain us. We move on our own time and we understand the importance of a slow approach to things. Most Tauruses usually have a slow burn success story (ex: Victoria Monet, Baby Tate, Janet Jackson), taking us years to really get where we need to go. This can be attributed to our refusal to just accept anything that comes our way if it does not make sense to us. We aren’t eager to just jump on any success train if that train does not match the bigger picture in our heads. We take our time. Laugh at us now, but… you’ll see in the long run. 

Dating a Taurus is fun! We are very laidback and chill, but of all the Earth signs we are known to be the most chaotic, unhinged ones. We’re ruled by the planet of Venus– the planet of love, beauty, art, and sensuality. If you want to date a Taurus, you must have an appreciation for the finer things in life. Tauruses are luxurious by nature and appreciate amazing aesthetics. We will take a picture of the skyline or the moon just because it looks pretty. We are sensualists and supreme hedonists. Beauty is important to us– causing us to place a high emphasis on pampering ourselves. Trips to the hair salon, nail salon, or our favorite stores. Tauruses love art and usually live in a crib that has an earthy feel to it, filled with plenty of art and plants. We love trips to the museum, massage spas, aquariums, or something as simple as hiking! Dealing with a Taurus is great because we will inevitably put you on to skin care hacks and routines, and stress the importance of winding down– especially if self-care if something you struggle with. We love physical touch and are INSANELY loyal to those we love. We take our time in getting to know people, so don’t expect a fast connection with a Taurus, otherwise you will turn us off.

Tauruses should work on our anger though. We are slow to anger, but once someone pisses us off– it’s not a pretty sight to see. We act in erratic ways that aren’t always beneficial to us. Our stubbornness is also a negative– making us miss out on valuable connections, learning lessons, and experiences. We’re also very calculated with our revenge when someone wrongs us– even if it takes us years. We’re slow with our get-back. Learn to let that shit go. 

THEME SONG: Recipe!, Jean Deaux

FIRE SIGNS (Aries, Leo, Sagittarius): 

Fire signs are just that… fiery. Feisty, energetic, and playful– these signs are the life of the party. They don’t possess a filter and are the most impulsive signs out of the entire zodiac. They speak first, think later. Fire signs will ALWAYS leave a mark on you– even if it doesn’t work out. These people look to inspire people everywhere they go, effortlessly drawing attention to every space they’re in. These are the extroverts who are guaranteed to leave a lasting impression at any event or job. They go with the flow and are often spontaneous, assertive, and dynamic beings. I think they are the bravest of the zodiac and have this unapologetic approach to life that allows them to be trendsetters and trailblazers. 

ARIES: 

Aries are the intellects of the fire signs. They approach their intellect with a cheerful and passionate disposition. These signs are impulsive as hell and refuse to conform to social constructs that hold them back as individuals. They do whatever the fuck they want to do. Aries are the most positive people I’ve ever come across. All the Aries I know could have their lives in shambles and they are going to find a way to be optimistic about that shit. I remember I was fucking with a man who told me some news that would’ve devastated me to my core… and he wasn’t even upset about it! They find the silver lining in everything and it isn’t an act. You can tell that they genuinely choose to not let the harsh realities of life get them down in the dumps. Aries are free-spirited, courageous, expressive, vibrant, and get shit done. 

My best dating experience was with an Aries man. He was so inspirational and always uplifted me and saw things in me that I never saw in myself. He left me with valuable life lessons and was always a sounding board when it came to my creative ideas. If I was sad? He always found a way to make me die of laughter. Dates with an Aries are fun as hell too! They don’t go for the typical, traditional dates. Think: gun range, rage rooms, playground dates, or anything requiring physical movement. Aries love moving their bodies and will push you to do the same! They can come across quite brash and blunt, so this wouldn’t be the sign for you if you fall under Water or Earth (depending on your Venus or Mars sign, as well as other placements in your chart). Aries will also always find a way to encourage you! They enjoy lighting people’s faces up, and will help you come up with innovative ways to feel better. These signs are also spontaneous as hell. They will text you at 2AM in the morning with a creative date idea that only they could come up with. They rarely plan anything, nor have structure in their dating lives. They love variety and a woman who is a homebody, extremely traditional, and vague would bore them. 

Aries have explosive tempers and while they are always the happy, positive friend, DO NOT underestimate their ability to blow shit up. It is actually a scary sight to see. They are intense and have the most explosive outbursts. They should work on picking and choosing what they give their energy too, since their energy is so bold and passionate. 

THEME SONG: S&M, Rihanna

LEO: 

Leos are known for their confidence, passion, creativity, and loyalty. Leos will intentionally and unintentionally draw attention wherever they go. They know that they are the best thing since sliced bread and will not shy away from letting you know. These signs are consistent and also have a warmth to them that other fire signs aren’t typically known for. Leos love to stand out and they march to the beat of their own drum– never fixating on what everyone else is doing. They make excellent leaders and planners and oppose any type of change, making them set in their ways. My favorite thing about them is the fact that they are fully aware of the fact that they are some of the most dramatic creatures on Earth, yet they don’t give a fuck. They love being admired and told how amazing they are. They love to talk, perform, and dress like they’re on the runway. It’s their world and everyone else is just living in it. My rising sign, which explains the energy you give off as well as how you express yourself– falls under Leo, which makes perfect sense. 

Dating a Leo is an amazing experience. They will be relentless in telling you how amazing you are. Words of affirmation are important for them to give and receive. They will not entertain anyone who refuses to remind them of how phenomenal they are. Leos can be a little fickle, but once they decide they love you, they are loyal as fuck. Even in moments of conflict, a Leo will love you down and defend you like it's their full time job. The whole world could be against you, and a Leo will hold you down. Leos like to be impressed and expect to have your undivided attention on dates. The spotlight should be on them and if they sense your eyes drifting elsewhere, they will be quick to cut the night short/ghost you. These signs expect a deep loyalty and commitment from whoever they are dating, as they can reciprocate that energy. Flirtatious, direct, and adventurous– a Leo is undoubtedly the most romantic and caring of the fire signs. 

Leos do have some negative traits– as all zodiacs do. They can be a bit self-centered and vain, disregarding the feelings of anyone else. Since they are fixed signs, they struggle with considering other points of views and truly believe that they are God’s favorite– making them perfect and free of any flaws. This can cause them to struggle with building a loving tribe around them and can translate into stagnancy as far as personal growth. Accountability is a foreign word to them. 

THEME SONG: DNA, Kendrick Lamar

SAGITTARIUS: 

Sagittarius’ have zero filter. They do not care what environment or space they are in– toning down their delivery or approach to anything is just not in the cards for them. Either you accept them as is, or go somewhere else– but best believe they aren’t going anywhere they aren’t welcomed. These fire signs are very curious of the world, place a huge emphasis on adventure, and are self-sufficient. Sagittarius’ question everything– making them philosophers. They love exploring the abstract and thrive in environments where their playful, childlike spirit can emerge. Sagittarius’ love to travel, meet different people from all walks of life, and love being exposed to anything that isn’t typically something they would go for. They are open-minded to different concepts, ideas, styles, music, etc. Being boxed in irritates them and honesty is crucial when interacting with a Sagittarius. 

When it comes to their dating life, they value independence. They can get lost in their work and their heads, so they do well with partners who aren’t super clingy and needy. In their minds, you should know they love you, even in moments where they need their solitude. Sagittarius’ dislike relying on anybody for anything, and will get things done by themselves. In all my encounters, it is very rare that a Sagitarrius will ask for my help with anything. They take pride in being independent. Adventure is important for them because variety is what drives them. These signs are experimental and will not mesh well with people who hold traditional ideals. Expect to always be challenged and questioned, as well as a host of spontaneous dates at the very last minute. You also never have to worry about losing freedom once you’re in a relationship with these people, because they actually want you to leave them alone sometimes. 

Sagittarius’ always say things a little too straightforward in my experience. It’s not that people don’t appreciate honesty, it’s just that the delivery can be a little brutal. I feel like building a community is a challenge because of their inability to consider other people’s communication styles and personalities as far as honest feedback. I could also say that their hyperindependence causes them to struggle in silence. It’s okay to ask for or accept help, Sag! 

THEME SONG: Let Me Calm Down, Nicki Minaj

AIR SIGNS (Aquarius, Gemini, Libra): 

Air signs are the analytical, intellectual, strategic, and sociable signs of the zodiac. I have multiple air sign placements and my Venus (love style) is in Gemini, which makes sense for me. These signs are witty, funny, open-minded, charming, and extremely flirtatious. These signs live in their brains 24/7, it’s like their minds never shut off. They aren’t known to be super emotional and clingy– giving them this rep of being emotionally detached. They intellectualize their feelings and fail to actually feel them at times. They’re hard to pin down because they lose interest fast, but their charm intrigues. They are social butterflies and love long conversations that challenge society, media, culture, or tradition. They are the outlaws and rarely traditional. Even if they want the typical marriage, family, kids, and career– in some aspect they’re always going to challenge some element of that. Air signs are known for their unconventionality, strategy, humor, and intelligence. These are the weirdo zodiacs. 

AQUARIUS: 

I always attract Aquarius men! They are the weirdest people ever– but in a good way. They rebel against everything and prefer to go against the grain. I love how charismatic they are about their creativity, ideas, and perspectives. Most Aquarius men I’ve come across are very progressive and innovative. They come up with ideas that I’ve never heard of. Have you ever heard Gil-Scott Heron’s ‘The Revolution Will Not Be Televised’? When I hear it, I think of Aquarius men. They can lead a revolution and are passionate about social change and dismantling social constructs that have never benefited humanity. Aquarius’ thrive on making moves that benefit society at large and approach life with a drive for impact. They strive for what’s right, making them great humanitarians and givers. 

Dating an Aquarius was fun in my experience. I loved having intellectual conversations where we constantly talked about capitalism, the patriarchy, gender roles, genocide, etc. Dates consisted of trips to the museum, paint n sips, poetry jams, the bookstore, and I even remember us putting a puzzle together over great conversation and pizza. I enjoy dating these signs. What I will say, though, is that they tend to be emotionally detached and unavailable. With me having a fearful avoidant attachment style, it worked for me. We don’t have to be together 24/7 nor talk on the phone every waking second. However, I am also very intense at the same time (props to my Scorpio placements), and I noticed that Aquarius men aren’t great at holding space for your emotions– nor do they know how to handle emotional intensity, due to them intellectualizing everything. Everything regarding emotion is a joke to them. They are flighty, inconsistent, and flaky– which wasn’t an issue for me (I’m a Gemini Venus, baby), but a good time nonetheless. 

THEME SONG: The Revolution Will Not Be Televised, Gil Scott Heron

GEMINI: 

I love that my Venus sign falls under this one. It makes so much sense as to why I always attract air signs. Gemini’s are known for their ability to adapt to their environments, their sociable and talkative nature, as well as their child-like energy. These signs are exciting, vivacious, flexible, witty, spontaneous, and let’s not forget… smart as HELL. Geminis are naturally curious about the world and have different interests every two weeks. They’re walking encyclopedias and know about pretty much everything due to their thirst for knowledge. Many people say that Geminis have two personalities– which is true, because they aren’t monolithic. They don’t like to take life TOO seriously, even in spite of their intellectual nature. Every Gemini I know has a short attention span, because being focused on one thing for too long can be...boring. They are big kids who refuse to let life box them into one thing. 

I’ve never dated a Gemini, but I am always intrigued by them. My Venus sign falls under Gemini and I guess I can vouch for them in the love department. I can be very fickle and flighty as far as how I approach men, largely because I understand that everyone isn’t for me. I flirt sometimes with people who I have no intentions on ever doing anything with because I feel like everyone deserves a little love in their lives. I’ve also entertained numerous men just because I was curious about them. I’m a ‘do it for the plot’ kinda girl. I’ll go on one date with you and then disappear or lose interest without informing you. The largest indicator in a Gemini being interested in you is constant, but flighty communication, sending you videos they found interesting, a random meme, witty banter– even if it’s every so often. Geminis are strategic and like to figure people out, slowly plotting on you and observing how you respond to them and their behavior. They can be slightly detached from their emotions when it comes to dating because they are known for their lightheartedness. Heavy conversations are too much for them at times. And we can’t forget that Geminis love variety. These signs crave new experiences and do not do well with people who always prefer a night in. They value independence, self sufficiency, and hate people who are too clingy. I must also add that Geminis love learning from people they are dating— even if they know nothing of the subject. You can rant on and on about architecture or a historical period and they’ll listen for hours, lowkey getting turned on that you’re so passionate about something. They are cerebral beings.

Geminis should work on establishing routine and structure. They dislike it because of their airy nature, always wanting to shift tasks and errands when they feel like it. However, slight discipline could be beneficial for their creative and professional pursuits. I think Geminis should also learn to embrace intensity. Stop being so scared of emotions– explore it! 

THEME SONG: Gemini (2 Sides), Wale

LIBRA: 

Of all the zodiacs, this is the sign that I attract the most as a Taurus. Libra men are always attracted to me and I always find myself attracted to them, despite my hate campaign for them. I never understood why they were always intrigued by me until I learned that we are both Venus signs. Venus signs are all about art, pleasure, luxury, aesthetics, self-care, sensuality and romance. And with my Venus being an air sign, we find each other connected mostly because of our intellect and flighty personalities. Libra men are the flirts of the entire zodiac. No one flirts as much as them. They are whores because they are Venusians. Charming, influential, but also insanely empathetic. These air signs care about justice and what’s fair. Open-mindedness is a

positive for them– forcing them to see the gray area in a lot of situations. Libras possess great social skills, but I’ve noticed that they don’t do well with conflict. They’ll avoid it by any means– creating this mass perception that they are emotionally detached. Might I also add, they are very idealistic, delusional, and daydreamers— even if they portray the opposite. Don’t let them fool you. 

I always liked dating Libras, but my issue with them is that these niggas be lying. But not in the typical sense. You’ll ask a question and they’ll leave vital pieces of information out– which is still lying at its core. That’s always my problem with them, but other than that– we get along fine. Always. Dates with them means you’ll be outside all day doing all kinds of activities. They appreciate the finer things in life– indulging in top quality food, experiences, and art. These signs are very supportive and will do their best to constantly make you feel great about yourself. Their romantic and sensual personalities make up for their flighty behavior most times. A Libra will talk you right out of your drawls with their charm. They desire words of affirmation from partners and must feel seen, heard, and validated by whoever they are with. Most times, they are turned off by people who are too serious and anal. The partners they choose are often fashionable, wise, attractive, community driven, and impactful. 

Libras should strive to work on communication as far as conflict. Y’all also need to stop leaving details out when people ask y’all questions! That is lying nonetheless! Also, stop being so hard on yourself. You’re doing great. 

THEME SONG: Winners’ Circle, Anderson. Paak

WATER SIGNS (PISCES, CANCER, SCORPIO): 

Water signs are the idealistic, nurturing, romantic, sensitive, tender dreamers of the zodiac. They are always in tune with their emotions and drift away from reality a lot. Water signs are emotional as hell and are okay with crying in front of a crowd. These people are givers and find joy in being compassionate and always looking out for the greater good of others. Escapism is the theme here for water signs. They often aren’t interested in tapping into reality and can be slightly delusional. They look forward to going to bed just to dream about their crushes and future life. A life with you will be created in their heads even before getting to know you. 

Pisces: 

I hate these signs– more specifically the men. Pisces men are only good for dick, money, and tears. My bad y’all, I just got triggered. 

These people are dreamers. They’ll fantasize day and night, on the clock, during sex… they just aren’t interested in real life. Delusional as hell– truly. They’re gentle and kind– often making them people pleasers. Pisces strive to make peace and have this sensitivity that allows them to thrive creatively. Their imagination is often incorporated in their art (think Erykah Badu, Jhene Aiko, will.I.am, Rihanna), pushing them into a state of escapism that they dwell in just fine. Pisces pick up on energy very well and will use it to their advantage.

In my experience, Pisces men are fucking insane and need to be 302’d. They will stalk you, obsess over you, and once you fuck them you are their property– even if they have an entire lineup. I had to get a restraining order on one nigga, (and eventually winded up fucking him immediately after for three years straight, smh. Don’t be like me.) but he was the sweetest when we weren’t beefing. Any indication of another man (despite us not being together) sent him into an emotional spiral. But I don’t want to scare you guys. Pisces are super romantic and attentive. They see things in you that you may not see in yourself. Any thought that you have in your head– best believe they already know. Pisces will never beat around the bush as far as whether or not they like you. They are very direct with interest. Dates will include candlelit dinners, roses, wine. It will look like something out of a rom-com, because they are obsessed with the idea of love. 

As far as negative traits? Sometimes they need to think in a logical manner instead of fixating on ideas and dreams all the time. It makes y’all crazy as hell and unhinged at times. Let’s use logic and discernment here. 

THEME SONG: Fantasy, Kali Uchis

CANCER: 

Cancers feel like a warm, cozy hug. A sip of peppermint tea. So chill, nurturing, and private. Cancers are the mothers are the zodiac. They are always looking out for their loved ones and are family oriented. Cancer women make great housewives, while the men make for great providers. Emotions run wild when they love someone, translating into a protective aura that feels both calming and stable. To be honest, I think amongst their many hobbies– like gardening, cooking, scrapbooking, and baking– crying is their favorite one. They don’t look at it as a sign of weakness either– it’s when they are most in their element. They are super affectionate and are no stranger to taking on other people’s problems. 

I’ve never dated a Cancer. But I’ve had long lasting and loyal friendships with them. They advocate for you and will fight for you. Very traditional beings who thrive in the comfort of their own home. Very private and big on hugs and physical touch. I’d like to argue the most self-aware sign. A Cancer cares about family, friends, and is big on stability. If you’re dating one, I’d imagine they’d love performing acts of service for you. A meal will be made when you get home, your laundry will be done, and the house will be squeaky clean. They care about your feelings and boundaries. 

All Cancers, in my experience, have a problem with always helping and taking on the responsibilities of others, even when their plate is full. Y’all really should stop that! People take advantage of them a lot because they wear their hearts on their sleeves, becoming easy targets for abusive people. Be emotional, yes. But know your OWN personal boundaries. 

THEME SONG: Summer, The Carters

Scorpio: 

Ahhh! Love Scorpios. My Moon (feelings + emotions), Mars (how you fuck + get things done), and Lilith (desires, fears + taboo parts) all lie in Scorpio. These signs are known for their

investigative tendencies, their ability to explore darkness and the taboo, as well as their psychic qualities. They are considered the most sexual of the zodiac and can be very intense. Scorpios are very calculated with their actions and wickedly clever. They usually are into occult shit: magic, hoodoo, etc. and are very intellectual. Scorpios reflect a lot, becoming obsessed with shadow work, journaling, and self-help books. They study people and pick up on patterns that others easily miss. Very observant and possessive. They also have this magnetizing aura where people are naturally obsessed with them/intrigued by them. Strangers will confess their love for them, even without ever meeting them. It’s just something in their seductive energy that makes them… addictive. Did I mention private? Even the most vulnerable and open Scorpios with sociable personalities keep a LOT tucked away.

If you’re going to fuck with a Scorpio or someone with prominent Scorpio placements– be ready for a wild ride. Once a Scorpio engages with you, it is you and only you– and they expect you to be the same way. When you cross them, they become spiteful, evil, and downright ruthless. They are very calculated and clever as far as how they approach people they are interested in. They already know their crushes birth chart, social security number, and have already run a background check even with the smallest of information. Scorpios force you to reflect and will hold you accountable. These signs love to touch and have an insanely high sex drive. Keep in mind, that there is NOTHING you can hide from them. If you think you’re running game on them, I promise you that you aren’t. These people dedicate their entire being to studying your ways, patterns, communication style, personality, and routines. Any slight switch up will set off their detective skills.

My Scorpio placements all fall in areas where Scorpios are most dominant, making me very familiar with their energy. There is nothing that I DO NOT know about someone. Oftentimes, people will tell me things that I already knew just based on observation, research, or… my intuition. Plenty of moments where I don’t know someone from a can of paint, yet oddly enough… I know their EXACT life story. That isn’t an exaggeration either– my friends can vouch for me. It’s scary. I believe I was blessed with some kind of gift. I’ve been accused of being a witch, putting a hex on people, or performing love spells because of how I manage to keep people intrigued by me. I can’t explain it. I’d like to say that one thing Scorpios can work on, however, is their possessiveness. You don’t own anyone. No one owns you. Be okay with experiencing people. 

THEME SONG: I Put A Spell On You, Nina Simone

So… that marks the end of my zodiac summaries. How did I do? Did I read you for filth? Let me know.